I Bi Dem: Woman, Wife, Mother

  Upsetting the afternoon It was a warm Sunday afternoon, and we were in the shade enjoying the not-so-cold Richards Bay winter. It was a tranquil atmosphere until the commotion began. Suddenly chattering displaced the quiet of the afternoon because our ‘landlords’ decided to pay us their usual visit. Vervet monkeys rule the roost in my area. They are a protected species and no matter the damage they do, we can’t do anything to chase them away for long. All we can do is protect ourselves against them. Consequently, they have become so bold that they just sit and stare at us as we make a show of chasing them off our property. Sometimes they go as far as taunting us and destroying our plants. And what can we do? Nothing! The law is on their side. Maybe, the law is right as we may be at fault here because this is their natural habitat, and we may be seen as encroaching.   Anyway, that is a discussion for another day. With the law pampering them to our hurt, the only sources of protec

  Praise the Lord with me. I am 50 today. I look back and all I see is the faithfulness of God in my life. When I was younger (I am still young), the number 50 seemed like a very old number, but now that the Lord has brought me there, it seems so young. I remember people I grew up with who are no more, and I am grateful. I realise that my being here today is purely by grace. Many people measure their lives by achievements, and it is a good thing to look back and see how much you have accomplished in life. It gives a sense of satisfaction – a feeling of leaving a mark. I measure mine by the grace that I have received and the people that surround me. If you had at any point in the past asked how I am doing I must have replied by saying that I am blessed. I do not say that glibly or to sound religious. No, I say it because I truly believe it.  I guess people see success from different perspectives . I say I am blessed because sometimes it does not appear so; in fact, at a point in m

  As I reflect on the past 50 years of life or at least since I learnt to read, I realise that the word of God has always fascinated me. It is no wonder that God uses it to play a huge part in my life like He does in many lives.   I would have despaired several times; I would have been discouraged; I would have given up if not for God through His word. I have held on to it for dear life many times. When all was dark around, only the remembrance of portions of the Bible lit up my way. I don’t know what I would have done if not for the word of God. I believe the Bible is the infallible word of God – every part of it. I am not a theologian of course; so, I cannot discuss it academically. For me, it is the life manual and guide. A friend once joked that I seem to punctuate my sentences with something from the Bible. I wish that this were true - that I have memorised the word of God in great detail, but alas it is not so. At the beginning of this year, I became convicted about how littl

  Happy Mother’s Day Today I’ll like to make a toast. Let’s charge our glasses. Being a mother has very little to do with the physical abilities to carry a baby within your womb but a lot about fulfilling the roles that a mother plays. No matter the way we look at it or claim to be fiercely feminist and anti-patriarchy, the fact that women are considered nurturers cannot be wished away. Whatever the concept of family that we may have, the notion of a mother is never far from our minds. We all want to have in our lives someone that has our backs at all times; someone who loves us despite our mistakes; someone who will love us enough to speak the truth to us; someone who will be on our side always. This person does not have to be a woman or even be a biological mother. Many lives have been enriched by aunties, stepmoms, grandmothers, sisters, or even fathers, uncles, or brothers stepping up to the plate to fill the office of a mother. The most important thing is to have someone pla

  Please excuse me for the long post. This has been on my mind for a long time and I just need to get it out. Obesity is a global problem responsible for huge medical costs because of the so many conditions it is a harbinger of. Poor diet and lack of physical activity are highlighted as the two biggest contributory factors. So, special efforts are made to encourage people to eat healthy and stay active. Are we winning in the war against the obesity pandemic? I am not so sure. Not with many fast-food joints springing up all around us. It does not appear as though the situation is likely to get better any time soon with eating out being considered in some places as a sign of affluence and less people wanting to cook their own meals. Cooking good wholesome meals often takes time – a commodity which no one seems to have.   Everyone wants something that can be popped into the oven or microwaved for a few minutes and voila food is ready!   No one cares that these foods maybe unhealthy. The

  As the week of Women's Day comes to an end today, let me say Happy Women’s Day to you beautiful ladies. It should be celebrated every day because each new day is a new challenge to conquer, and I dare say that we are doing it well in spite of circumstances militating against us individually and collectively on so many levels. These circumstances come in all shades and often defy explanation to others, but we keep at it day by day and we emerge stronger than before on the other side of the tunnel. As the week-long festivities of the Women’s Day comes to and end, let’s talk about our need to partner up. We need to encourage ourselves - to say to other women around us, 'come on, you can do it!' At the end of the day, we are all better for it.  I can't say enough about the ministry of an encourager.  We need to leave behind the days of antagonising other women in a bid to curry favour from men. When we talk about relationship problems tearing women apart, if we look lon

  https://kiteactive.com/pt/become-a-host/partner-up The alarm went off at 5:30 am. I just wanted to snuggle in bed, but I didn't.   I got up, brushed and got dressed; it was time to go walking. I looked out and it was cloudy.; the regular Richards Bay sun was not out. Every bone in my body shouted at me to get back in bed - the weather was just not conducive for walking. And besides, missing one day would not be the end of the world. I rationalised from all sorts of angles but eventually I stepped out because someone was waiting for me. I met my friend at the junction we had agreed on, all set to go walking and she said she almost did not come out as well. I told her of my own experience, and we laughed.   The fact is that we were each other’s strengths - neither of us would not have gone walking that day if we did not think the other was waiting. It speaks of the power of partnership - the power of two. Solomon talked about this strength in Ecclesiastics 4: 9-11 when he right

  The right tools? During the week we had some problems with our garage door.  It came slightly out of the roller - just slightly so and we thought we just could push it back into alignment.  So we thought but it remained a thought because try as we would, we couldn't push it in and eventually we had to call in the professionals. I was so distraught because that meant the security of the house was somewhat compromised not to mention money leaving our pockets, but what else could we do? The company sent in two men and the job was done in less than five minutes. To say I was shocked would be an understatement.   With all the effort we had put in without positive outcome, I expected it to be resolved only after an operation with lots of bangs and noise to accompany them. But no! They brought out a power tool, unscrewed the two affected bolts and aligned the door. And just like that the door was as good as new.  The company out of the goodness of their heart and good connection ref

  The world, at least a great percentage of it, rejoices with the United States of America on the inauguration of her 46 th president. It is the first in many ways, with President Biden being the oldest president in American history and Kamala Harris sworn in as the first female Black Vice President. We rejoice that finally the world’s superpower is coming on board with having a female in such a position of authority. It lags behind so many countries who have had women as vices or heads of government. Well, rather late than never. I wish Kamala success in her tenure and look forward to seeing a female American president soon. As a woman, I am ecstatic about the development. Madam Vice president proves so many points - that you can aspire to the highest possible position even if you are married, female, black- Asian and of immigrant descent.   She proves to us all that we can have it all as women. Equally notable is the poem rendition by Amanda Gorman. True, she is not the first fema

    The month of January is known for so many things as the first month of the year; some people have dubbed it ‘Januworry’. It is the time for many to make new year resolutions, the time to start all over, a time of renewed hope and aspirations and for salary earners a very long month to payday. The last pay was probably early in December and without proper planning must have disappeared with the festivities of the season. January is a month of big spending especially if you live in a country where the school calendar runs from January to December. It is time to cough up sizable figures for school fees, uniforms, books, and other expenses. In some other places, it is time to pay the annual rent.       January can also be a very exhausting month, especially for us as women who over December found it difficult to rest for an unavoidable reason or perhaps simply failed to use their license to rest. With the second wave of COVID-19, fear of infection, death, loss of jobs, and so on,